Once in a while it is possible to plug in a USB cable the right way on the first try.
Not all Canadians are unnaturally friendly, and some never in their lives say, “Eh,” or, “Aboot.”
There’s at least 2 people alive to this day who still find Dane Cook funny.
Some Genji mains are actually very skilled players who don’t cry out for healing every time they see red in the distance.*
All small dogs flip their shit and bark at anything that moves.
This last one is actually the exception to the exception to the rule. It’s true that all small dogs flip their shit, and bark like lunatics at anything that moves.
Notice how the cats are completely content to just stare at the bird and daydream about how savory it would taste and what McNugget sauce would go best with it’s feathery meats. The dog, in typical small dog fashion, looses its mind and leaves chaos in its wake.
One time in high school, for a school play/drama club performance, I used a hair pick and more hair spray than the entire East Coast leg of an 80’s MetalMania tour to puff my hair into an afro to pretend I was a painter. There was no need to explain what painter I was trying to be, and nobody needed to ask. Everyone knew there was only one white guy in the history of forever who could pull off an afro:
Bob mutha-truckin Ross
Bob Ross was a gift to the world, and we weren’t good enough for him! We never did anything to deserve such awesome among us, and yet there he was.
His show, The Joy of Painting, consisted mainly of him standing in front of a blank canvas all by himself and talking to seemingly no one while he dabbed at his paints. If you stopped to watch for more than 1.2 seconds, his spell was upon you. The next 25 minutes of your life belonged to him, and you liked it!
Bob Ross owned your ass in the most calming, serene way possible. In addition, he had some of the most hilarious word choices and catch phrases imaginable. Chances are if you’re reading this you already know some of his more common sayings. ‘Happy little trees’ and ‘We don’t make mistakes, we have happy accidents’ are the two that first come to mind and make special appearances in the PBX autotune remix below.
If you’re like me, however, you have countless other quotes that bounce around in your head in his soothing voice. My personal favorite has always been, and I’m doing this from memory so it may be off a bit, “To paint a tree you have to think like a tree. Go out in your yard and talk to a tree. Make friends with a tree. Your neighbors may look at you funny, but tell them you’re an artist. They’ll understand.”
In addition to painting, his commentary often reflected his outlook on life and was always optimistic and encouraging. As proof, I offer up some of my favorite quotes from the list Katherine Brooks compiled over on Huffington Post.
Click to see my favorites after the jump, or go to Huffington Post for the full list.
First of all, shut up. Second of all, I played all these games when you were kneehigh to a grasshopper, you little whippersnapper, so don’t sass me when I get all nostalgic as I look over this list. At least, I would look over this list, if I could just find my damn trifocals… for my other trifocals.
GameSpot has put together a list of what they consider to be the top 26 games of 1997. Now I hardly even remember 1997, but I sure as hell don’t remember some of these games. Alundra? Is that even real?
Other games, like Goldeneye 007 and Final Fantasy VII, stand out as absolute classics and got hours upon hours (some would say months upon months, and we call those people ‘Honest’) of gameplay on my now retired old consoles.
Top5Central was nice enough to provide a list of places I hope to one day get arrested for enjoying.
This video features 5 water slides that are technically illegal, but not so illegal that there’s armed guards, murderbots, or sharks with friggin laser beams on their heads posted nearby.
So… ya know… how bad can they really be?
The challenge with all of these slides is naturally getting to them in the first place, but once you’re there the slides look amazing and are surrounded by some of the prettiest land you’ll ever trespass on while wearing a thong.
Get ready to add a few locations to your bucket list!
Did you ever hear a girl (or guy, who am I to judge?) at prom complaining about how someone else wore the same dress they did? Infuriating! How dare they? Dat bish! Naturally, the girl’s (or guy’s, equality yo!) friends would cluster around to reassure the wounded ego that they looked MUCH better in it than that other hussie. But that doesn’t ever happen in real life, does it?
Two Wonder Woman cosplayers at MEGACON had a similar face off, but there was no question about who wore it better.